Hi Fertile Friend, Can I ask you a question. Is there room in your life for a baby right now?
I mean this week, today, what does your life look like? Are there slithers, patches or masses of big, bright, beautiful white space? And by space I mean… physical, digital, emotional, mental, and spiritual space.
I know in the early days of my 5.5-year fertility journey, I became so desperate to conceive, that month-after-month I lost touch with the true spirit of why I wanted to be a mum. I booked myself into fertility related appointments left, right and centre (trying to force our baby along). I became sloppy around the house. I’d binge drink on a Friday night to forget about my fertility woes (and then beat myself up for it all weekend). I’d cram so much into my social calendar, that in essence there was no room for a baby in my life.
I was saying loud and clear to our future baby:
I don’t have time for you in amongst my busy schedule
One of the biggest lessons for me on my journey was to slow down, create space and lovingly invite our baby into our life.
A lack of space can be a huge roadblock on our fertility journey. It can wreck havoc on our hormones, relationships, energy, motivation, productivity and connection with the universe. You may feel irritable, depressed, anxious, emotional, overwhelmed and run down.
When we consciously create room for a baby in our life, we are essentially inviting them into our family.
You are shouting from the rooftops:
I am ready for you baby
So just how do we go about creating space in our life? How do we craft a life that is bright, light and clutter free to let our spirit babies know we are ready…
The other day on Netflix, I watched the documentary, Minimalism which really reiterated the concept of creating space and simplifying life.
When we moved house about 4 months ago we applied the minimalism idea in our own way. We literally looked at every object we owned and if we didn’t absolutely love it – we sold it, donated it to charity, gave it to a friend, or for the totally unsalvageable items we put in the bin.
Take a look around your house? What does your home environment look like? Is it cluttered and uninspiring or cosy, warm and inviting? Is it fit for a baby? Sure you don’t need to jump in and set-up the nursery just yet, but de-cluttering, simplifying your stuff, cleaning out a draw for your baby, and placing that cute little teddy somewhere special, all sends out loving energy to your baby that you are making room for them in your life.
Explore your physical space right now. Is there room in your life for a baby?
Too much screen time has been linked to a restructuring of your brain (and not in the good way), diabetes, obesity, high blood pressure, eye strain, lower cardiovascular health and an inability to fully process emotions. If you did the numbers how much time would you spend in front of a computer, on your smartphone and watching TV? Would all the time you spend on today’s fast paced digital products be conducive to having a baby by your side? If your answer is no, how could you could cut back? Could you read a book, cook a nourishing meal, spend time connecting with your love, take a walk in nature, enjoy your favourite hobby, or meditate and connect with your future baby?
Explore your use of digital space right now. Is there room in your life for a baby?
How are you emotionally coping with your fertility journey? Are you sad, depressed, anxious, guilty, ashamed, angry and constantly teary? If you’re feeling this way, you are not alone. Fertility challenges are one of THE, if not THE hardest thing you will ever go through. But it is worth speaking to a fertility coach or counsellor to help you work through your emotion and grief.
In my free e-Book Understanding Your Fertility Journey, I break down the 7 steps of your fertility grief. This will help you understand what’s happening, why you feel the way you do, and give you a roadmap to working your way through this journey.
Explore your emotional space and state right now. Is there room in your life for a baby?
Is the constant mental chatter associated with your fertility journey driving you nuts? I know in the beginning it did for me? It was a total mind f$*#. With constant thoughts like:
- What’s wrong with me?
- What doctor should I see?
- What supplements do I need?
- Can I eat this?
- Why is this happening to me?
- What’s that twinge? Is it my period, or could I be pregnant?
- Should I book that holiday? Maybe I’ll be pregnant?
- Does anyone understand me?
- Why is it so easy for some?
- Another bloody pregnancy announcement.
- Did eating this screw up my chances this month?
- This month’s a write off after hubby had that big night out with the boys.
- Am I ever going to be a mum?
- Why me?
- Its so not fair.
These voices distract us from faith, hope, love, surrender and living out the life that’s right in front of us.
The number 1 tool for me to quieten my mind and go from crazy-town to finding peace was meditation. It doesn’t happen overnight, but gradually the stillness and space creeps in and you will move towards acceptance, hope, peace and finding a way forward to parenthood. Here are 15 more tips to cope with the mental marathon of your fertility challenges.
Explore your mental space right now. Is there room in your life for a baby?
Are you connected to your inner self and spirit? Do you feel an affinity to a universal power? You may call it God, Jesus, Buddha, The Divine, Spirit, The Universe, Mother Earth or another name.
Creating Spiritual Space is necessary to connect and call in our spirit babies. When we create spiritual space, we come back to our heart and move to the ebb and flow of the universe. We are then able to surrender, detach from the outcome, live in the moment and start to enjoy our fertility journey. Sure there may be tough time (to be honest you can count on it), but by creating spiritual space, you will live in faith, hope and love and truly understand that there is a greater plan for you.
To craft your spiritual space, create a room, a nook or a window at home where you can go to enter into stillness, meditate, reflect, re-balance and just BE. Your special space is the perfect place to ask for guidance, connect with your spirit baby, meditate, pray, do yoga, read and connect back to your heart.
Explore your spiritual space right now. Is there room in your life for a baby?
Clearing out the clutter and creating space will have amazing effects for you and your future baby. When you create space in your life, you have:
- Room to think
- Room to love
- Room to de-stress
- Room to be creative
- Room to have fun
- Room to thrive
- Room to transform
- Room for peace and…
Room for your baby to work its magic and inch itself ever so closer to you…
Is there room in your life for a baby? Your future baby might just be waiting for you to sort out your stuff and create some big, bright, beautiful, white space. Where can you make a start and create a little space magic today? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.
Are you looking to boost your fertility? I’ve created the ultimate kitchen companion for your fertility journey. With over 40 super fertility food recipes you can feast your way to a nourished and fertile life. Find out more here.
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